Homework? yes please

So some of friends are taking or have taken classes where some of their homework assignments have been to go to a certain type of concert (i.e. Jazz) or watch a specific movie. Why can't I get homework assignments like that? All I get is relating the wave equation to the diffusion equation and design a mono to stereo audio amplifier for a fake company. What's the deal yo?

Half Alive

It's four AM, I'm waking up to your perfume
Don't get up, I'll get through on my own
I don't know if I'm home
Or if I lost the way into your room
I'm spiraling into my doom
I'm feeling half alive but I know one day
You and I will be free,

To live and die by our own rules,
Free..
Despite the fact that men are fools.

I'm almost alive, and I need you to try
And save me.
It's okay that we're dying,
But I need to survive tonight, tonight.

Well excuse me while I get killed softly,
Heart slows down and I can hardly tell you I'm okay
At least 'til yesterday,
You know you got me off my highest guard,
Believe me when I say it's hard.
We'll get through this tonight
And I know one day you and I will be free

To live and die by our own rules,
Free..
Despite the fact that men are fools.

I'm almost alive, and I need you to try
And save me.
It's okay that we're dying,
But I need to survive tonight, tonight.

And you touch my hand ever so slightly
(Girl we're not ready for this yet)
And the deadly look she cast upon me
I won't regret, I won't regret
I won't regret. I won't regret...

And I was trying to disappear,
But you got me wrapped around you
I can hardly breathe without you
I was trying to disappear
But I got lost in your eyes now,
You brought me down to size now.

I'm almost alive
And I need you to try and save me.
It's okay that we're dying
But I need to survive tonight, tonight
Tonight...

I'm almost alive, and I need you to try
And save me.
It's okay that we're dying,
But I need to survive tonight, tonight.
I need to survive tonight, tonight

A Troubled Mind

There comes a certain time when we should contemplate
the end of everything familiar as we know it
we will not follow the same path tomorrow as yesterday

oh the way i slowly lose my mind
it just reminds me i should limit my
time on selfish things i don't need anyway

i don't know where i'm going
i don't know where i was
i just know that i need you wherever I end up
and if i lose my head you'll help me see where i should go

as simple as a message to me as can be (as can be)
i only want something to let me know you're here

oh the way i slowly lose my mind
it just reminds me i should limit my
time on selfish things i don't need anyway

i don't know where i'm going
i don't know where i was
i just know that i need you wherever I end up
and if i lose my head you'll help me see where i should go

if my mind slowly disintegrates into something useless
will i still have your sweet embrace to keep me company?

will i have still have that sweet embrace to keep me company?

i don't know where i'm going
i don't know where i was
i just know that i need you wherever I end up
and if i lose my head you'll help me see where i should go

Ninteen

Ancient sore oculi
Couldn't see the change
But blissful lights still happen
Through the darkest days
She strokes her hair
In the bathroom sink
It lost volume
It lost the will to give

I gave up
On falling asleep
As the hands began to shove

Before you've even seen it
The old horizon's gone
Another recollection
Of the blind, deaf summer sun.

But eyes are not the be all
And end all of the west
The east may hold a pair now
But maybe just address the doubts you have
There's no great rush to make this change

She showed some sense some time ago
When she was happy
She thought that this would make her happier.

I've told you for the fifth time
I've told you for the twelfth
I'll give up just when you will
You better warn yourself
You'll get left back
In the cold and rain

And now and again
Balancing your roles
I see you get bogged down
And though you say it's not good
Your life still lingers on
And so now, little gosling,
Don't become a swan.

I tried to be so special
And I thought I was alone
I wanted to be special
But I failed us all

So please, now,
Please just trust me
Your life still lingers on
And so now, little gosling
Don't become a swan

A few thoughts

I've been meaning to write about some things for awhile, but I don't think they deserve their own posts, so I'm combining them on to one.

1. Act your age

So I haven't had much luck in relationships with girls my age even if we're just friends I never really get that close to them or I eventually say or do something really stupid and is tarnishes our friendship, but surround me with females not close to my age and I'm a stud. I work in one of the dining commons on campus and I work with some older ladies. Some of then are in their 40s and some are older than my mom, but every time I work with them they tell me how much they love me and that I'm the best. Seriously. I was having lunch with a friend of mine and I went to say hi to one of ladies I work with, and as I'm walking away she says to one of the people she was working with "he's the best." There's also half a bus of middle school girls who think I'm the greatest thing in the world, but I'll save that story for later. Even any minor success I've had with any type of relationships with girls close to my own age has come with girls a couple years older or younger than me.

2. It's good to be king

So I'm taking a racquetball class this semester. I came into it just hoping to have fun and get better. After the first two days I thought I would be close to the top ten of the class, but it turns out that I'm probably the best player in the class. One day in class the instructor wanted to demonstrate how to referee a game, so he said he would pick two of the best players in the class, so that everyone else can watch and learn how to ref. Well, he picked me and some other guy, and I beat him 11-0. after that there was definitely a feeling of new found respect. I only talked to a couple of people in the class before that day. Most people didn't really care to get to know anyone else in the class, but after that day almost everyone remembers my name and acknowledges my presence whether in class or if they see me around campus. A while ago someone asked me what my proudest moment was,and I really didn't have an answer, but this might be it. I know I'm not really that good, but maybe I need to play someone who is really good to humble myself a little.

3. Tattoos

I've decided that I might get tattoos at some point in my life, and I know what they'll be. On the back of my left arm I'll put : החין של אלוהים (God's grace). And on the back of my right arm I'll put: הפאר של אלוהים (God's glory).

Because of his grace and for his glory.