Forward, Russia!

No I haven't turned into a communist. Every once in awhile when I want to write, but don't really have anything to write about I'll post lyrics or write about a band. Today it's Forward, Russia!

They're certainly an interesting band. The first time I heard them was when I saw their music video for their song "Nine" and it was really good. I like the style of it and the shots of the band and cuts they used. I bought one of their cds recently and I like it. They're really weird. They make some interesting and random musical statements, and you can almost never understand what they're singing about even if you can hear and understand all the words, but I like them. They're different maybe that's why I like them.

Forward, Russia!

Where did you go?

And it feels like this is the last chance I have to say
Every word that I've been fighting.

Well I have finally decided, to hold my head up with pride
And accept the way life takes you through these changes.

Cause when you reach the stars, you've made it.

It's just something that I've been drying to let you know-
And now that you're gone I'm holding on, and I just can't let go

I get a little down on my self.
But when you came around
The world felt knew
I opened up my eyes to the light
And I saw deep inside of a love that was true

And if I ever let you go,
I'm hoping that some time will show-
That you're the one, you're the one for me

And it feels like this the perfect time for me to say
That deep down inside I'm hurting, but at least I know you're worth it.

And if I hold myself with pride and accept the pain
Then life will take me through these changes cause I have so much left to see.

It's just something that I've been dying to let you know.

Cause now that you're gone I'm holding on and I just can't let go.

I get a little down on my self.
But when you came around
The world felt new
I opened up my eyes to the light
And I saw deep inside of a love that was true.

And if I ever let you go, I'm hoping that some time will show-
That you're the one, you're the one for me

So lets go back down to the back of that river where we we can dive right in
And forget about the worries from the world outside, cause you know my world,
My worlds not over because I have an angel on my shoulder.

And I'll be coming home, and when I feel those butterflies
I'll see that I need to find a better way just to believe you're gone.
So long, some day I'll find the strength to move on.

I get a little down on my self.
But when you came around
The world felt new
I opened up my eyes to the light,
And I saw deep inside of a love that was true.

And if I ever let you go,
I'm hoping that some time will show.
Cause you're the one, you're the one for me.

The man

So once again I find myself raving about my favorite artist: William Fitzsimmons. He recently did on online concert where he his in a studio and was streaming live and a bunch of people watched and listened and sent him messages while he played. He's so good.


a little video

It's also fairly appropriate for what's been going on in my life recently.

Inaugural Thoughts

So I watched Obama's inauguration today. I don't know why. I didn't vote for him. He was going to president whether I watched him or not, and I'm typically not one for that kind of pomp and circumstance. Anyways here are some of my thoughts about what I saw.

The best: I don't know if you watched it or even if you saw the whole thing, but I started watching when the Clintons came out, and for me the best part of the inauguration was the guy with the bright red scarf and fedora. He was to the left of the stairs about half way down. I have no clue who he was or why he was there, but his fedora was sweet.

Obama's entrance and red fedora.

The worst: Regardless of what actually happens during the next year or two, Obama will be infallible. The media's love affair with him coupled by the overplayed historical significance and radical fans opens almost unlimited doors for Barack to do pretty much whatever he wants. Even if the economy gets worse and he fails to deliver on the promises he's made no one will blame him for a year or two. That could end being good, but I don't like it.

The terrifying: Joe Biden is vice president. I would take a bullet to save Barack if for no other reason than to keep Joe Biden from becoming president.

He's crazy.

The comical: I thought the screw ups in Barack's oath were funny. So what if he was excited and spoke too soon? So what if Chief Justice John Roberts said "to" instead of "of". It's funny. I also like the underlying irony that Barack opposed Roberts' appointment.

The sickly: Aretha Franklin. I know I'm not a music expert, but she sounded awful. She's 66 years old and no longer has any vocal range. There should have been someone closer to their prime singing, but ultimately it didn't cost anyone any r-e-s-p-e-c-t.

Nobody will remember: John Williams' compilation. I thought it was really good.


Air and Simple Gifts.

The controversial: I loved that Rick Warren ended with the Lord's prayer. Some people are mad that he did that because it is so strictly associated with Christianity and the whole separation of church and state, but nobody cares that Barack talked about God and "quoted" scripture. As pastor Aaron said on Sunday, if you don't want a christian to invoke the name of Jesus when praying then you should pick someone else.

And finally, The speech: Fresh off of CAS 100 I actually have an idea of what a good speech sounds like, and I approve of Barack's. Not that I'm surprised. It's what he does best.

Speech.

Service Tax

Everything has its price. Even if you're doing something good, it's going to cost you something. The question how much are you willing to pay to do or get something, and what happens when the price is too high?

Lately I've been in a spiritual funk. I haven't been doing regular devotions. I haven't felt really good about anything. I just feel like crap, and I think a big part of the reason why I feel that way is because of my role in ACF. I am so concerned with the needs of the church and what I can do to meet those needs that I ignore my own needs. Is it possible to give too much? Should I be willing to sacrifice my own spiritual growth for the growth and development of the church? I shouldn't have, but if I had to choose one should I choose the church? I haven't learned how to maintain both.

That's one reason why the sabbath is so important. We need that time to step back, recharge, and if need be get focused back on God. That's what I've lost. ACF is no longer a place where I can come to make myself right with God. It no longer is part of my sabbath because I have responsibilities at ACF that need to be taken care of, and I haven't figured out how to replace that. A friend of mine said today that we need to just let God do things instead of us trying to do things, but that's not who I am. God uses us to accomplish things, and if something needs to be done, I'll do it. With so many things going on and so much to get done staying relaxed and calm is stressful. It's not that I'm trying to do everything by myself,maybe I am, but when other people at ACF can't or won't do something it usually falls to me because I'm wiling to do it. Maybe I should say no to more things.

I'm going to disappear for the next week and try to get back on track.

Because of his grace and for his glory.

Hypocrisy # 785

We better pick up the pieces
Feels like we're losing control
To see the truth when it's naked
Just throws us out in the cold
I could make you a promise
Look you straight in the eye
But you know I find it so easy
To trade the truth for a lie, sometimes

Do as I say, not as I do to you
I'll only let you down when we're the only ones around
What's in your blood? What's in the air you breathe?
There's more than me and you choking on the golden rule

I could I tell you I love you
You'd say you've heard it before
It feels a lot like the last time
Always the same four chords
And though I know I'm a failure
Still I just have to believe
Somewhere someone's gonna show me
Just what this honesty needs

Do as I say, not as I do to you
I'll only let you down when we're the only ones around
What's in your blood? What's on your tv screen?
There's more than me and you choking on the golden rule

We're all politicians and TV preachers...
Someone save us from ourselves

Note to Self

Two roads split off from here,
and my life goes running in opposite directions.
Exaggerating the barrier between who I am,
and who I want to be.

I wanted to be the breath of fresh air,
When everything smelled so insincere.
But this taste still lingers in my mouth,
Deceit has ways of sticking around.
And I'm ready to disappear,
Vacation seems far(seems far) from here.

Note to self:
I miss you terribly.
This is what
we call a tragedy.
Come back to me,
Come back to me,
To me.

Note to self:
I miss you terribly.
This is what
we call a tragedy.
Come back to me,
back to me,
To me.

I can feel my mind
wandering again.
Into where I don't know,
and will I ever get home?
Time starts moving
faster than I can.
And I'm sick of this scene;
I need to break the routine.

Two roads...
Split off from here,
and my life goes running in opposite directions.
Exaggerating the barrier between who I am
and who I want to...

Which part of me is left?
I feel so close,
and yet I am so far.
Which part of me is lost?
I feel so close,
and yet I am so.... FAR!!!